I have been trying to keep track of my dreams lately in the hopes of being able to practice even in sleep so, in a strange way, lay night’s disturbing dream was a victory.
I reveal looking at pictures or tarot cards with someone. As we were looking the woman with whom I was studying the cards said something to the effect of “My how scary!” I looked down to see a Polaroid in black and white with a livid of a family: a mother, daughter and son. As I looked the girl’s gave became distorted. We kept looking and now they’re were other pictures where wisps of white smoke were moving to create scary looking visages. I believe I began to come up into consciousness at that point and what struck me was that I needed to generate metta.
In the half waking state I first tried generating metta simply by using the parikamma I normally do. This failed so I tried chanting the Metta sutta in my mind. I didn’t have enough clarity to remember it but I did remember some blessings I have used in the past. I began repeating :
May there be every good blessing.
May the devas protect you.
Through all the power of the Buddha,
May you forever be well!
And so on for the Dhamma and Sangha. After some time this year receded and, if I was being visited, I hope the poor being was helped. I now recognize the need to really learn the parittas by heart so I will be working with chanting every night for at least fifteen minutes. May all beings be free from suffering.